BY Patricia Lefave, Labeled, D.D.(P)
The word psychosis literally means:
Psych... = Psychic or pertaining to the mind
Osis... = condition
Though it is very frightening, (or funny or comforting, or confusing) when we don't understand it, it is also serving a purpose because it is FULL of meaning, delivered to us in mostly symbolic form, like a dream or sometimes a nightmare. It is extremely emotional in content, often about things we can’t, or won't, or don't, allow ourselves to know when we are awake, in our everyday lives. It is so powerful and overwhelming that it blends with concrete reality, in a way we can't quite separate, nor put together. We look constantly for the missing piece or pieces of the puzzle which will allow us to make sense of the whole thing, both internally and externally.
Though it is one of the most traumatic experiences of our lives, it is also a healing thing and gets us past our distress once we understand it, if we ever manage to do that. We are, of course, often fought every step of the way in our quest to do so. When it is suppressed, especially forcefully by psychiatrists and drugs, it gets stronger and even more overwhelming when let out too fast after a long period of suppression.
Our psychosis is also a healing thing, trying to tell us something important about both ourselves and others. Psychosis is always true on SOME level; concretely or symbolically/emotionally, about the past, or present, or our hopes and fears about the future. Mine has told me something about hope for the future; a future which I sense is not too far away now and which will allow us, as a group, to leave all this confusion and chaos behind us.
I would like those of you who are currently going through this to know something. I, for one, would NEVER blame you for what others have done to you and then covered up. Abusive people of all degrees try to blame their victims so that the abuser can get away with it and avoid responsibility. I will not accept excusing the people who do this, or ‘overlooking it’ (as we are so often instructed to do) or ‘forgiving’ it in those who are without any contrition and who keep right on behaving the same way.
It is also about all of US together, who have shared the same experience. We ARE the people who are united together in a community of understanding and in mutual support. Ironically, when you feel you don’t belong, that is when you DO belong to the whole group which has often felt the same way. This community is, or can be, like a good family of peaceful, respectful humans, "Being." We are the "higher mind." Not power mad controllers but peaceful equals, who have all come through terrible pain, suffering and confusion to a new wisdom.
If you are on the process of going through this, you are part of this community already. It may help you to think of the experience as being on a collective level of consciousness which human beings do not ‘normally’ experience unless there is some occurrence, or cause, of consciousness alteration. Think of it as having an existence all of the time of which most people are not forced to become aware. Think of it as a collective level, like a sphere of being in which all of the others are struggling to understand the same things that you are, and in which they feel the same things you do; frightened, shocked, bewildered, angry, violated and overwhelmed . Think of all the other ‘Voices’ struggling to be free and to feel safe, just like you. Remember that when you are inside the collective consciousness with the spirit (or minds or souls) of everyone else.
It helps some if you visualize it as a sphere of souls all struggling to get their own boundaries back, and to get the other ‘voices’ (whether you believe they are real or symbolic) out of their personal space. In my own experience, I found the most effective way to do that was to take an equal position, seeing myself neither more nor less than any other spirit within the collective whole. This is some of what worked for me and I offer it in hope that it will work for many others also. I believe that for many of you, you just have a little more to learn to get your ego boundaries back. (Individual identity which YOU control successfully by yourself.) I have faith in you, because I know that if I can get through this, you can too and even if the cause is not exactly the same as mine, you can get a better understanding of it and better control FOR yourselves as individuals.
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