-Change the World
By Patricia Lefave, Monophrenic
Instead of using the forever
dysfunctional “No One Must Be Blamed” bit, change it to the
realistic “EVERYONE Must Be Blamed” premise, because that is
always true to one degree or another. Dysfunctional groups don't
REALLY believe that “no one is to blame” anyway and never really
have. They believe in nominating a group member to be the “one”
with the problem and then they all project all their own errors onto
that one for no other reason than it is socially sanctioned to do so
and it makes those doing the projecting feel better about themselves
by comparison. It is the comparison though that is the problem. What
and who we need to compare ourselves to is ourselves. How am I doing
today in my self actualization and personal growth process compared
to how I was doing yesterday?
There is a constant suggestion given by
many people, from many different points of view, both secular and
psycho spiritual, most of whom are well meaning and well intentioned
when they make the suggestion. The suggestion is that we must all
make a choice between being for ourselves as individuals or living
for the benefit of others or for the whole group. I don't accept that
this needs to be a 'choice' of one OR the other. We must choose BOTH
of those. That means that we must become unique and separate
individuals, AS WELL AS an equal part of the whole. “Equal” does
not mean identical. In other words we must be completely separate
and unique TOGETHER. Developing unique, self contained personal
identities with good boundaries IS the principle which used as the
premise of all we do, connects us as ONE.
By changing the premise of thought you
will stop blaming victims for being victims, stop excusing aggressors
for being aggressors and stop supporting and enabling the
dysfunctional group members who are mostly unquestioning followers
who just go along with whatever everyone else is doing and thinking
at the time. If what the leaders are doing and thinking is based on
the above stated premise than even the unquestioning followers won't
get themselves or anyone else into a mess. CHANGE the false premise
and change the World.
We CAN 'blame others' when it is
appropriate to do so, with words, not violence. We CAN blame
ourselves when we screw up and we CAN get over all this dysfunctional
crap. We don't HAVE to feel hopeless and helpless because we DO have
power over our SELVES and ONLY over our SELVES and that is enough. If
we ALL use our power over our SELVES, we CAN as a GROUP, on a
collective level, make real and everlasting PEACE happen.
There is something in this I want all
you self defined experts on life to think about. Visualize it. When
you change this premise, what you are actually changing is the shape
of life. You are shaping it differently by changing the
psycho-spiritual structure itself from that of a hierarchical pyramid
of “power OVER” others as it is now, to that of a SPHERE of
influence and personal empowerment with the nucleus of stable value
and meaning for ALL at
it's centre. We must keep it simple
using the principle, “we are one and we are many” as the
foundation stone upon which peace is built. There can be no
imposition of wills, nor can abuse of others be sanctioned or ignored
because one cannot get another to accept a different point of view as
valid. We can neither impose upon, nor accept BEING imposed upon,
without comment.
Concrete example of action as “one”:
The torture in any way, of anyone BY
anyone for ANY “reason” must be universally condemned by all
groups inhuman behaviour and unacceptable for our planet.1
That is how we create an infinite loop of life instead of a loop of
destruction.
We CAN change the world. BUT (and
that's my Big But!)
We are all going to have to grow up
psycho-spiritually to do it.
Look at yourselves. You are NOT a large
group of “objective observers” and I am not an OBJECT. I AM A
PERSON. If you think that is “funny” that I have to tell you that
maybe you should be asking yourselves why you don't already KNOW
that. What you are is a large group of arrogant, often abusive,
subjectively projecting dysfunctional participants in a GROUP
phenomenon of followers, being led by one person with a hidden agenda
of domination.
Wake up to REALITY. You are “at
cause” AND “at effect.” Now “DO something about It!
1 Let
out human motto be “Many Minds, One Voice- Many Voices , One
Mind”
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