Sunday, September 11, 2011
Change the Premise- Change Reality
-Change the World
By Patricia Lefave, Monophrenic
Instead of using the forever dysfunctional “No One Must Be Blamed” bit, change it to the realistic “EVERYONE Must Be Blamed” premise, because that is always true to one degree or another. Dysfunctional groups don't REALLY believe that “no one is to blame” anyway and never really have. They believe in nominating a group member to be the “one” with the problem and then they all project all their own errors onto that one for no other reason than it is socially sanctioned to do so and it makes those doing the projecting feel better about themselves by comparison. It is the comparison though that is the problem. What and who we need to compare ourselves to is ourselves. How am I doing today in my self actualization and personal growth process compared to how I was doing yesterday?
There is a constant suggestion given by many people, from many different points of view, both secular and psycho spiritual, most of whom are well meaning and well intentioned when they make the suggestion. The suggestion is that we must all make a choice between being for ourselves as individuals or living for the benefit of others or for the whole group. I don't accept that this needs to be a 'choice' of one OR the other. We must choose BOTH of those. That means that we must become unique and separate individuals, AS WELL AS an equal part of the whole. “Equal” does not mean identical. In other words we must be completely separate and unique TOGETHER. Developing unique, self contained personal identities with good boundaries IS the principle which used as the premise of all we do, connects us as ONE.
By changing the premise of thought you will stop blaming victims for being victims, stop excusing aggressors for being aggressors and stop supporting and enabling the dysfunctional group members who are mostly unquestioning followers who just go along with whatever everyone else is doing and thinking at the time. If what the leaders are doing and thinking is based on the above stated premise than even the unquestioning followers won't get themselves or anyone else into a mess. CHANGE the false premise and change the World.
We CAN 'blame others' when it is appropriate to do so, with words, not violence. We CAN blame ourselves when we screw up and we CAN get over all this dysfunctional crap. We don't HAVE to feel hopeless and helpless because we DO have power over our SELVES and ONLY over our SELVES and that is enough. If we ALL use our power over our SELVES, we CAN as a GROUP, on a collective level, make real and everlasting PEACE happen.
There is something in this I want all you self defined experts on life to think about. Visualize it. When you change this premise, what you are actually changing is the shape of life. You are shaping it differently by changing the psycho-spiritual structure itself from that of a hierarchical pyramid of “power OVER” others as it is now, to that of a SPHERE of influence and personal empowerment with the nucleus of stable value and meaning for ALL at
it's centre. We must keep it simple using the principle, “we are one and we are many” as the foundation stone upon which peace is built. There can be no imposition of wills, nor can abuse of others be sanctioned or ignored because one cannot get another to accept a different point of view as valid. We can neither impose upon, nor accept BEING imposed upon, without comment.
Concrete example of action as “one”:
The torture in any way, of anyone BY anyone for ANY “reason” must be universally condemned by all groups inhuman behaviour and unacceptable for our planet.1 That is how we create an infinite loop of life instead of a loop of destruction.
We CAN change the world. BUT (and that's my Big But!)
We are all going to have to grow up psycho-spiritually to do it.
Look at yourselves. You are NOT a large group of “objective observers” and I am not an OBJECT. I AM A PERSON. If you think that is “funny” that I have to tell you that maybe you should be asking yourselves why you don't already KNOW that. What you are is a large group of arrogant, often abusive, subjectively projecting dysfunctional participants in a GROUP phenomenon of followers, being led by one person with a hidden agenda of domination.
Wake up to REALITY. You are “at cause” AND “at effect.” Now “DO something about It!
1 Let out human motto be “Many Minds, One Voice- Many Voices , One Mind”