Thursday, April 25, 2013
Wipe Those Inappropriate Affects off Those Superior Faces
April 24th 2013
I am at the library listening to a group of people debating and evaluating psychologically/verbally assaultive group behaviour. The most common emotion displayed during this discussion are the group's SMILES and laughter.
One guy says he would not know what it was like to be “ganged up on” as he “pretty much gets along” with “everybody.”
There is an old biblical saying, if “everybody” likes you, then you are doing something wrong.
What always strikes me in these group assessments is the turn around; the turning AWAY from the judging of the aggressors and toward the judgement of the victims. It is like saying you would not be group assaulted if you had been well liked (like the speaker who wants to feel safe and secure) by those performing the assault. It is similar to other excuses for group abuse or crimes against individuals. Like women being told they would not be a rape victim if they were not “sending out signals” indicating they wanted to be assaulted. Or university students “knowing” THEY could not get a psychiatric label because THEY are not sick.1 Or idiots trained to believe they can't be a victim unless they CHOOSE to be and therefore those who don't know that “deserve” to be attacked as an “inferior.” This is the stuff that generates Stockholm Syndrome in victims. "I have to get the psycho holding me hostange with the machine gun to LIKE me so he won't blow me away. Of course the smiling assessors rarely, if ever, see the lack of logic in their own assessments; mainly because they don't really WANT to see it or hear it. When held hostage it's one thing but why the delusional need to feel safe when it's NOT you? Are you smiling too much to get attacked?
Usually what the “popular” people are doing wrong is making sure they stay popular with pretty much EVERYBODY. That of course means not taking an unpopular stand against ANYTHING.
Then the topic turned to “teasing” which is usually defined as cute and “fun” and the smiles and laughter appeared again.
The reason we don't see this problem is because the people discussing it don't see themselves. You consistently miss the point. The point is this:
Your GROUP behaviour is DENIED to exist and is re-framed as the imagination of those on the receiving end of your assessments and evaluations. This creates the SPLIT in reality which you then work very hard to keep from seeing and hearing in order to maintain the group delusion of superiority, normality/abnormality and “difference.” There is no real difference. It is an illusion.
Next the discussion turned to crazy people and the difference between crazy people who are really smart and crazy people who are really quite stupid. The topic they did not cover of course is the one on the crazy people who think they are sane and “normal” and never suspect, for even a minute, that their agreements together about who is crazy and who is not, is a predominant symptom of the craziness in them and the sick society that they routinely support and enable, with all those amused smiles about those crazy people who are just not like them. This is another point of agreement between us.
Here is a new thought for you:
What if you didn't define the people you are discussing in their absence, or worse, from four feet away, as “crazy,” as your starting point for your group discussion? How would your assessments and judgements of what they say and do change, and how might your assessments of yourselves and what YOU are saying and doing change as well?
Change your premise; change your experience. Change to World, one idiot at a time. Pretend, just for the fun of it, that the people you are calling crazy, actually aren't crazy. They are just in a lot of distress from being CALLED crazy ,and then being treated by others “as if” they were crazy.
Then listen to what they tell you about their experiences of you and others and see if you can make any “sense” of it when attached to your new PREMISE.
1 Ignoring the fact that “claiming” you aren't “sick” is one of the things which gets assessed as a 'symptom” that you ARE sick!